Retail Hell The Book

Customer Reject

My friend Spritzy took this pic. She  said, "I guess someone realized that salty snacks only result in serious water retention."When customer's decide not to buy an item and then dump it wherever, it can sometimes be funny. That's why I call them Customer Rejects. I could not have staged a better Customer Reject. Thanks Spritzy!

I'm In Love With Marc Ecko

So I shopped for some new threads for the BEA Book Expo in NY and as usual Marc Ecko speaks my language with skulls and crests! Like this cool vest:

Which I HAD TO BUY...for the Retail Hell dinner in NY. And then I found this amazing Marc Ecko shirt to go with the Marc Ecko jacket I already had for the BEA book signing:

Check out the back:

aah....Marc Ecko will you marry me?

I also had to buy these:

Unfortunately, not made by Marc Ecko.

Shopping Cart Enjoying Memorial Day BBQ

Handbag Hell

Images of my Handbag Hell past - holiday weekends were always the worst. Piggy Shoppers everywhere - pillaging and decimating.

Now I just photograph it...a horrified spectator...


Damn Piggy Shoppers!

Lame Memorial Day Sale Signs

Seriously - 15% is like saving ten cents at this store...come on now...

And this store sells SHOES:

Customer Reject

mmmm...deep fried ruffies!

Me Is Retail Hell Happy

Look what I found waiting for me on my doorstep! The Retail Hell galley books and BEA shopping bag! They look fantastic. Get ready Stephen King and Kathy Griffin - some Retail Hell is coming your way!


Lovin the bag hanging from the L! Better than my neck.
Props to Frank Rivera and team - they did a retailicious job with the cover and all this imagery I get to use on the blog!

Scary Things You Find When Cleaning Out The Closet

Circa 1980's. Looks like I gave to a charity (probably at gunpoint). The torn silver star? Timeliness, perhaps? Retail is so high school! One thing I know it didn't come from: opening new accounts. I sucked at that.

Ripped Mannequin

Now we just need to remove his pants...he really shouldn't be wearing clothes.
He and Barbe-Q would make the perfect couple.

Barbe-Q Mannequin Controversy

Leave it to a mannequin to make people hungry and then upset a community.

What the hell? Come on people - Barbe-Q wasn't naked! She had on a bikini top - geesh! Give the girl a break. And that ugly gray shirt has to go. Let her show off her knockers. Most mannequins are not so stacked!Hilarious video.