December 23rd in NYC

Since my flight got canceled after the show and I had to stay another night in the great city, I went for a walk in search of mannequins and Retail Hell. Found them everywhere. But first, check out this view from my hotel window: Three CNN Bitches staring at me all the time! Nancy's big eye just freaked the shit out of me. When I woke up in the mornings I could see her gazing at me through the slit in the curtains. How scary is that?

A huge crowd to see the Rockettes. I'm not one of them...but the outside looks cool.

 

A blurry shot of the tree at Rockefeller Center and some major outdoor Retail Hell - I can't imagine having to sell photo ops in the freezing temps! The woman did not look happy. Can you blame her?

 

So Christmasy you could vomit!

What in Retail Hell? Stupid people lined up in the freezing cold to see Sak's Holiday Windows? I am stunned...especially since the windows were lame...except for this:

 

A fat ice skater girl about to kill three penquins.

 

Giant colored suppositories! 

 

Leave it to me to find NYC's biggest balls ever!

 

...of course I run right into a freakin red shopping cart chained to a pole by the Times Square subway entrance.

 

And Mannequin elves pretending they are in Vegas

 

 

Manni elves are cute, but nothing beats chocolate kiss mannequins!

 

 

My friend Rich asked me if I missed working the busiest day of the year. I don't miss the stupid and mean custys and the massive crowds and piggy shoppers, but I miss the Retail Slave friendships, laughing at custys, and the holiday bitchfests that went down in the stockroom....and all the food we used to sneak in. 

 

But I have to tell you this...it took me a good hour and half to put all these pics up on the computer in the hotel lobby and through it all, I had to listen to one horrible fucking classic Christmas song after another...yes I wanted to rip my ears off, but they were already numb from the icy NYC temps...so when Barbara Streisand started singing Jingle Bells, they just completely fell off...

 

 

  
 
 

Comments

[judy]

That was an AMAZING set of pictures and captions! I LOVED IT! It is late and I was laughing out loud until my son asked what I was laughing at from his bed! Thank you Freeman! You are amazing!!