Hello there! Long-time surfer, first-time poster here. Just call me Movie Mogul.
I am not sure if this necessarily fits in with "retail" directly, but it's a horror story I thought I might share. Actually, it's not one specific story, but a cumulative effect sort of thing.
Way back in the dark ages, I was the assistant manager of a movie theater. Luckily, face-to-face douchebaggery was fairly rare, but you would be amazed at the things normally decent people do in the dark.
I swear they think the lights are off in the auditorium all the time, so whatever they do there will never be seen. It was among my duties to help clean up the auditorium at the end of the night, and trust me, folks, we turn the lights ON.
And some of the stuff we would find is horrifying.
Anyone taking the job would expect candy, popcorn and soda spills; that is just par for the course. But how much brain damage does it take to NOT notify an usher or someone at the concession stand that you have vomited copiously onto the floor (or onto the empty seat next to you)? Even if it wasn't you, if it happened next to you, or even within five aisles of you, you are just going to let it sit there? Seriously?! The stink from that is enough to knock a person over; how stupid or apathetic do you have to be to think, "Oh, well, only an hour left in the movie, not my problem"?I have never been a parent, so I cannot speak to this next item with any authority, but when junior shits their diaper, perhaps...just PERHAPS you should change the little crap factory in the restroom. That is generally the room where shit is disposed of, am I right? Those changing tables in there are not snack trays, for Christ's sake. As I said, I have never been a parent, so maybe it is socially acceptable to leave your little bundle of joy's steaming wrapper full of defecation right there on the theater floor, with warm little waves of shit-smell delighting your fellow moviegoers.
But the real capper in my tenure at the theater--used condoms, used tampons and the occasional pile of ADULT human shit notwithstanding--was the time I found an open switchblade knife WITH BLOOD ON THE BLADE. Honestly, What. The. Fuck. Was this a gang-related stabbing? Hardly likely, since this took place in a tiny Iowa town where everyone knows everyone. So...what? No one came staggering out with a bleeding wound, that I recall. A do-it-yourself appendectomy, the wound cauterized with a Bic lighter? I have no clue.
Finally, let me share you my tale of what I like to call Kiddie Hell Night. This was on a Saturday, the opening weekend of a very popular animated musical from a very popular animation factory.
In our concessions order the week prior, they forgot to ship us any lids for the soda cups (yes, we had three sizes of soda available, but the cups were designed so one size lid fit all of them). So try to imagine three shows that night, packed with hyperactive little fuck trophies ALL of whom bought soda, in a packed auditorium that holds 350 people.
Now, our theater had a slanted floor, that led to a "liquid collection area" in the front of the theater, with a blocked drain that never worked all the time I was employed there.
I am not exaggerating one iota when I tell you that the lake of soda at the front of the theater that night was almost six inches deep; it literally had nowhere to go. I remember cleaning up with our crew, our pants rolled up to our knees, our shoes and socks removed, shin-deep in that sticky, cold flood.
I consider myself lucky that I have long since escaped customer service hell. But I hold the utmost respect for those still trapped there.
--Movie Mogul
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