From Retail Hell Underground, my friend Dianne recalls some custy hell at The Big Fancy:
I didn't (Thank the LORD and I'm agnostic) have to deal with TOO many cranky ass customers, but I just remembered one woman I would gladly have bashed with a Hosiery leg.
This happened when I was selling Hosiery naturally. I just got on the floor, there was a huge crush of potential customers, and my heretofore lovely coworker handed one customer off on me, an older woman who really didn't speak any English at all.
Not that that is a problem beyond it's really hard to communicate, usually we struggle forward and make it happen.
The woman had two pair of different tights, one in each hand, and was VERY animated and speaking in her own language at me.
Ooook, she switches to simple words and all the sudden it occurred to me what she wanted.
She wanted the impossible.
She had Store Brand Tights in Khaki in one hand, and DKNY tights in Sand in the other.
She wanted me to "Go get DKNY Tights in Store Brand color!!!"
Uh - we don't have little pixies in the back, just my cranky ass manager and she's a screamer.
I spent about 20 minutes trying to convince this woman it was either one pair or the other.
She finally stomped off, by then all my other potential customers had been helped by my previously lovely coworker, who also got all the sales.
Thanks a pantload.
No, she didn't buy a thing. Not that that REALLY matters, but I blew 20 minutes of my 100% commission time explaining ad nauseum that DKNY doesn't poop out store brand tights or vice versa.
Ten minutes later, I happened to see Impossible Customer speaking in her own language to a guy who sold in shoes across the salesfloor, he spoke whatever language she spoke, they never came over, otherwise I would have explained the problem.
I never minded when customers would come up with two brimming bags, wanting me to rering them because they forgot to ask for no sales tax (Oregon or Alaskan shoppers), at least it's an easy solution.
Sometimes it's so frustrating that vodka in a water bottle seems like a delightful necessity, that always worked at law firms.
--Dianne
PS I got asked again to come back and sell.
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
